October 24, 2013

Birthdays are very special to me. Maybe it’s because I was born two weeks before Christmas, so growing up my birthday always felt rushed, with everyone focusing on getting ready for the big holiday. I’m not alone in feeling this way. I know lots of other December babies who have felt this at one point or another in their lives. That being said, since birthdays have always been a big deal for me, I’ve always strived to make it a big deal for the people who are in my life. Well, today is Dad’s birthday! Doesn’t matter how old or young he is, because as I like to joke, after 21 does it matter the age? Besides he’s too humble to care about birthdays or the focus being on him or his age, so let’s just say he’s several decades older than 21 and a couple of decades younger than 90. We as a family are extremely grateful this year that Dad is even here to celebrate another birthday. Things could have turned out much differently and I could be writing about how I miss Dad because he’s no longer with us. I don’t have to do that this year and I hope to not have to write about that for many years to come. Hope is one of the most amazing concepts ever.

Perspective on life is different for everyone though. To give an example of this, one of my closest friends lost her mother on this day one year ago to cancer. So while we celebrate Dad being alive and not succumbing to the stroke that altered his life forever, she is reminiscing about the loss of her mother and best friend, to a horrible disease. Earlier this year I had to put my eldest dog down and while sad for me, the event happened to occur on the day one of my best friend’s sister gave birth to a beautiful baby boy. Where there is death there is always life. Perspective is subjective. I have lots of friends who have lost either one or both of their parents, friends who have lost their children (including my parents who lost their first born, my sister Trisha, when she was just over two years old), friends who have lost friends, friends who have lost spouses.

So while we observe Dad’s birthday on this 24^th day of October 2013, I remember how lucky we are but I also remember my friends and those closest to them that may be gone now but not forgotten. Everyone has a different life adventure and story to tell, that’s the beauty of the human experience. Today’s story for us is it’s Dad’s birthday and I am tickled pink to be a part of it and to celebrate it. In true Walter fashion we observe his birthday the only way we know how…by going out to dinner! So Happy Birthday to my Dad, may he have many more to come!     

Below are some photos of Dad when he was a bit younger.

     

Occupational Therapy

I came home yesterday to discover Dad had effectively been terminated from Occupational Therapy for the time being. Medicare requires progress to be made with regards to Physical, Occupational and Speech therapies. As we saw late this past summer Dad quit Speech therapy, but truth be told, they were ready to terminate services with him, because he wasn’t meeting his weekly goals. He can pick up Occupational Therapy again at any time, with a referral from his PCP, but for right now Occupational Therapy felt all three therapies were too much for him.

Everything has been clear sailing for months. The last three weeks there have been some issues. There was a week Dad had some stomach issues, the week after that he was hit with a horrible cold (it’s a good thing I was never a parent because I would have been way too overprotective), then last week he threw his lower back out. All forced him to stay home and skip one or more of his therapies, sometimes for multiple days.

You don’t think having Speech Therapy for only half hour twice a week and on opposite days Occupational & Physical Therapy combined for a total of an hour and fifteen minutes is a lot. Especially when there is no commute time as Mom and Dad live a mile from where therapy is. You don’t think about it if you’re like me who is on the go from the moment I get out of bed at 5:30 am until I sit down at night. Or my brother, who runs his bed and breakfast, sometimes serving breakfast to 14 people and then doing load after load of laundry before heading off to some community event he might be participating in. It’s a lot for Dad though, now, after the stroke. It is a lot.

After Mom and Dad told me the news, Dad gave me a funny look. To be honest I think he thought I was disappointed in him. I’m usually gung ho and very much of the attitude that you can do this or that if you put your mind to it and work hard. I know now what Dad can handle and what he can’t. I just looked at him, said, “Ok,” and I began to make dinner. I wasn’t disappointed in him or upset about this. How could I be? He did what he could do and when he’s ready he can go back and continue, something I know he will do. It’s as simple as that. And we carry on…     

Fall

I was driving around this past weekend, taking leaf photos, as we are in peak season at this moment. I headed up to what I loosely call “the big city”, Bangor. Having lived in the area on and off for 20 years now, I’m pretty familiar with where to go to take photos, which trees have fantastic colors, where the vistas are spectacular without having to hike up a mountain, etc. As I rounded the bend in the road, following the Penobscot river, trees in full bloom on either side, I came upon EMMC, the hospital where Dad stayed, the hospital I bill for. It sits along the banks of the river. My first thought was, the view of the river is fantastic from several viewpoints in the hospital, specifically the floors of the Grant tower and the end of the haul way before you enter acute rehab. For a second I thought about going in and heading to those sections or exploring other areas to get some photos of the trees along the river. For a second. Now I’ve been back to the hospital many times since Dad left, one of my best friends works there, so we’ve met for lunch, etc. I said to myself this day, “I’m glad none of us had to see what the river looks like in the fall from that vantage point.” I drove away.

Dad is continuing to improve. Always continuing is better than stagnant. He was fitted for a new hand brace that splays out his fingers to help with the atrophy that has occurred and he is to wear it three times a day for an hour at a time. It’s kind of like a soft ping pong paddle that straps to his arm. He was recently fitted for a new ankle brace and we are just waiting on it to be made. The one he has now goes under his foot, wraps around the outside of his ankle and comes up the front of his shin. He had voiced some discomfort with this, so we are having another one made for him that will come up from under his foot and go up the backside of his shin. Hopefully it will help.

As we gear up for Dad’s birthday next week (the kick off for our holiday season that continues with Halloween, Thanksgiving, Mom's birthday, my birthday, Christmas and ending with New Years) I leave you with a couple of fall photos from Maine, none of which were taken at the hospital, enjoy!